So I had a reader and they even posted a coment. Sweet! So things with grace moved to a new level. It took me a day or so to realize it but driving always makes me think. So we went to AT&T to get me a new cover for my iPhone and a new phone and a new phone line for her business. She tried to get the line added to her account but they wouldn't let her unless she changed her number to a 775 number and then she wouldn't need another line. She has had her 619 number for 8 or 10 years and isn't an option to do. It's part of her and she has a hard time with change. So she asked me what I thought. I said I pay this much a month and that adding a line whould lower my bill. So she said ok. We got her a new phone and made my account to a family account. So two year contract fir her business and me for that matter. I had noticed that she was uneasy. At the time I thought it was because it was takeing for ever to get it all set up. But looking back I now know it was the comitment issues she has. Witch means she's trying realy realy hard to make things work between us and that things are going well between us. Makes me happy to know this. When chafing with her today on yahoo messager she called me dear. I got all warm and fuzzy fellings. Lol we talked about alot of things but one I'm going to hit up here.
So we were talking about family and visiting them and how I haven't seen my dad in a few years. I call him maybe once a week. If I'm realy bored. I don't like talking to him for many reasons but the biggest is that no matter how hard I try the talk always cuts short. Like a two min talk. That it. He calls me sometimes an still only two min long. I don't know what it is about his side of the family but I don't like them at all. The only ones I like are my cusins. Don't like my aunt and her boyfriend. I like my uncle but he's an idiot. Can barely take care of him self. I always felt weird around them. Um maybe it's me cus I feel alittle weird around my mom and step dad. Maybe I just can't be around my family for what ever reason. I have no problem being around graces family. I feel welcome and part of the family already. And since I have only been around them twice....isn't that strange. There has to be some reason I feel more comfertable around other familia then my own. Like when I went to my cusins baby shower. I had a good time but felt awquard around my family. I don't get it. I love my moms side of the family. I even feel comfertable around my step dads family. Most of the time. Aaaaahhhhhh maybe it's because I always feel like I'm being juged all the time. Like I'm not good enough to be with them. I can see how that is since I grow up never realy getting approveal for anything I accomplished. I was always told I can do better. Do better. Not good enough do better. It has to come from that. Now about my dad. Ever since I got my cdl I have always made the trip to see him. Only time he came to me was when he happened to be in the area and even then I had to meet him half way. I'm tierd of makeing all the effert to see him. If he wants to be in my life or his granddaughters life he has to step up and make an effert. Now since I talked to grace today. I have changed my idea alittle. Once I get a local job I may plan trips to see him and his family. We will see.
Grace took down my papers today to the court to get my name changed. Now she had to sign a few papers and the lady helping her said it souls be ok. So if all goes well maybe by the time I go home I can have my name legaly changed and can get my hazmat back and start applying to local jobs. I'm so exited!!! Oh and grace was telling me about some of the derby drama that's going on. Well one thing she talked about was haveing a shcedual to teach the fresh meat how to do all the skills of skateing. And that if one person choose a Friday night a month that the new girls could get the coaching they need. Plus that way everyone whould get along better and want to stay. But back to what I wanted to say. Grace talked about us in the long term. Well alot lately come to think of it. Maybe she's gettin over her issues about comitment. Idk but I'm happy were we stand. Blah blah blah ok bed time. Got to start driveing in a few hours and I'm sure I will be blogging then too since I started this thing at um 6 am. Lol
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