Duh

So I'm an idiot. I'm being used. Atleast that's what it feels like at the moment. I was the thing to get the other guy to get to make a move. I'm holding back tears right now. I'm at practice and is realy hard. Am I wrong? Here's what I saw tonight. They look at each other across the room. She is the only one that bumps or any kind of contact with him(from what I can see) and he bumps or contacts her in a flirty way(she the only one that he does this to). Am I wrong in thinking that I'm being used so this guy makes a move on grace? The problem I have is that any time away from practice she is atentive to me. Holding hands, a hug, a kiss and just being there. The only time she isn't and doesn't want much to do with me is when we are at practice. I don't know if it's because she doesn't want everyone to know we are dateing or if she doesn't want the other guy to think we are that serious. Idk. We had sex last night and she was realy quiet. I felt like she was thinking of the other guy. It felt weird. She was there but not. Maybe im just over reacting. I do have trust issuse and I'm trying to get past them. Until last night I would have said things are going great with grace. And I still think they are but what I say last night altered my thinking a bit. It's the next morning and things seem fine again. She's texting me. I'm trying to think this through. If I was interested in someone and they seem to be interested in me but date someone else that would be wrong. No if I was interested in someone an they weren't interested in me and I dated someone else that would be ok long as the first person I was interested on didn't then say ok I want to date you. Would I could I dump the one I'm dateing to see how things would go with the new person? No I couldn't because I know that the new person is only interested in me because I'm dateing someone and they know they can't have me right now so the got interested. Once they get me things would work for a time but then they would fall apart. The wanting would leave and then I woul have lost the chance with both people and would feel like crap. How do I know this. I have done it in the past and had it done to me. It's not a good feeling. Well I'm going home to spend the day with my daughter. After reading my past posts I can see that at the time I write one and then comeing back to it later that I don't always feel the same way. I belive that by outing it down helps clear my mind and work through the small little isuess I have.